Always Held

It hasn’t been an easy day. In fact, parts of it have been rotten, that hard kind of rotten that makes you cry. The kind that sends me outside again and leads me into wood and field. It looked stormy standing in that dead cornfield, stormy in the sky and stormy in my mind. Today I needed help from both Heaven and Earth. 

In even this day, though, there has been beauty. There is always beauty somewhere. Always. 

I saved two salamanders today. They were on the road. The road is a dangerous place to be if you’re only several inches long. I was too late to save the others, already dead or hurt. But twice, I picked up a little orange creature and moved it into safer habitations. Two Red-Spotted Newts have a better chance in life tonight because I picked them up earlier today. This random act of kindness happened as I walked with a friend, who was performing a different kind of rescue in my life- carefully picking me up out of a deep worry pit. She was rescuing me as I was saving slimy little amphibians. 

Later, back from wet walk, I cuddled a kitty, tiny blue-eyed fluff. Surrounded by love and gentleness, Kitty and sibling kitty had not a care in the world. “They’re held, so they’re happy,” said my friend. They’re held. I’m held, too, you know. The hands that hold me hold the world. His hands are gentle, and He cradles me with care. But am I trustful happy? Do I trust His hands as Kitty trusted mine?

No, it’s been hard to trust today. Trust is difficult when you’re combined hurt and stressed. Happiness is elusive when circumstances collide in confused chaos. Will my story always be so complicated? 

Stormy skies. They’ll keep coming back. They always do. But He will keep picking me up and sending people to help me grow. He’ll keep holding me, this Trustworthy One. I’ll sleep in His hands tonight, as Kitty slept in mine.   

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